man, after this christmas, i am loaded. i usually get piles of stuff that i’ll never use. my most important present was a “hipster handbook” from my sister. it is the best thing ever and obviously my new bible. i also got a dollar in my stocking with a note attached that says, “contribution to the free michael jackson now coalition”.
i got my boyfriend a jesus action figure for christmas, and a book by pat boone called, “a miracle a day keeps the devil away” for his upcoming birthday. i put a lot of thought into my gifts.
the boyfriend visited last week, and i learned that in addition to him not being fat, my mom also likes that he always looks clean. i am celebrating new year’s/his birthday with him this week and i’m pretty excited. i’m such a girl. i’m never talking about boys again.
the end.
“tampon strings?! what the hell is that?!” –overheard from my dad on the phone.
until today i completely forgot that my mom and sister call ankle socks “faggot socks”
i spent yesterday night and this afternoon with my boyfriend. we hadn’t seen each other for five days and it felt like forever. it was pretty fantastic, even though we really didn’t do a whole lot. we sat around and watched a lot of comedy central and he cooked me breakfast. (!!!) i could just go on and on about things i love about this, but i am turning into even bigger of an emo bastard every day. i decided that i am too cool to be emo.
tonight at work, this lady wasn’t happy or something and took her box of biscuits, and said to one of my co-workers, “i’m going to show you what i’m going to do to your biscuits,” and then proceeded to shred them. then she closed the box and handed it back. that was awesome.
i got a raise and didn’t even know it. i’m pretty satisfied, although i still get paid in the form of human feces.
i am home for christmas vacation until january 9th or something around then.
i was supposed to work this afternoon but my car is stuck in the driveway. i had to dig it out from under a mountain of snow before i realized i couldn’t get out. at least it was nice powdery snow and the wind outside is not insane and angry and blowing off your face.
today i think i’m going to cut snowflakes out of paper and drive my mom crazy by putting them all over the house. i haven’t done that since i was about 12.
motherfucker, i aced you!
things i got for my birthday:
-yarn
-panty liners
-tampons
-toothpaste and floss
-yeast infection cream
-$1 mcdonald’s gift certificate
-socks
-coloring book
-2 cakes!
-whoopee cushion
-a “floaty” charm bracelet
-picture frame
-shirt
-microwave popcorn
-a skribbles spinhead
it was nice, but i reacted weirdly to the “surprise” party. they put the gifts in mcdonald’s bags and also wal mart bags with duct tape. and there were a bunch of burger king crowns involved. it was a nice gesture but i honestly am not one for birthday parties, especially when a bunch of people who don’t care to be there are there.
it has been one of the longest weeks of my life. but everything was resolved yesterday! and now i am 20.
i have to close for the next three nights at work. hooray.
